Friday, January 06, 2006

Leon and the Pile of Dead Tree Souls

My life is starting to sound strangely like a children's book in which one learns important life lessons through quirky adventures. Here's how the inside blurb of such a tome might read:

Our protagonist goes head-to-head with "Leon" the fly-by-night salesman from New Jersey who has decided to add "Art Director" to his Eastern territory. He makes a list of ridiculously silly demands and artistic critiques that causes one to wonder if Leon favors polyester suit jackets and plaid pants. Little-Bo-Jen is then dragged before Leon in a spur of the moment conference call. She manages to channel her "Sopranos" vibe and Leon is soon rolling over and asking to have his tummy scratched like a good client.

Things are not to remain well for long, though. In her unending desire to please and make an insanely unreasonable deadline, Jenni Longstockings releases a file to her vendor sans a final printout to her boss or the dread Human Resource division head. The job gets printed and is ready to ship on-time, when suddenly three errors are discovered!! There is no choice but to have the job reprinted, as the dread Human Resource division sees the Creative Department as a unfortunate infestation of color upon their bland and grey cubie-land. Luckily, Jenni Longstockings' boss dashes in to save the day by pulling cash out of the department fund to pay for the job re-run. Jenni can only hope that this blockheaded act will not impede her potential hiring in the next month and send her into such a spiral of despair that she will sell her horse and house to move to Cuba in hopes that planting a tree farm there will appease Mother Earth for the trees she put to a untimely death by being cocky.

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